Thursday, September 07, 2006
feel kinda mix feelings now! yea... kinda happy, tired, sian and empty...u all might think i am crazy or wad.. i kind feel empty and lost... heh... lost as in no aim in life.. nothing to look forward to!
church sub-ministry a lil screwed.. not say the whole thing is screwed.. is just tat the plan that we are suppose to carry out in not being carried out.. and partly my fault... didnt really spend time planning and think properly also..
oh ya.. the YM canteen.. i am kinda lost also... dunno wad to do... totally new to it!! alison u're a failure..
attachment ending.. which makes me feel happy but yet will miss them kinda feeling... the place is scary at times.. but u will have fun talking to the patients.. make them laugh.. they irritate the shit out of u.. den u complain to ya fren or go back and tell stories to family... and get all hype up! heh.. HAPPy cuz i dun need to be so busy with attachment and left my frens dangling around.. and cant be contactable kinda thing.. yea..
getting fatter and NOT losing weight!!! argh... hahaha.. i neva reach that goal of mine! haha.. it was my goal to make since i join cheerleading!!! hehe.. its been months alr! heh!!
dunno who will love me and who to love!~ heh!! thats horrible huh! *grinz* - was planning if i shld even typed this point- haha.. makes me feel empty.. however.. i must treasure my singlehood!!! shant whine too much on here! later u all say i despo! hmpf.. I AM NOT! just pouring my feelings out.
holiday time!!!!!!! my polyclinic is on the 9 of oct! wah!!! heh! can rest for quite some time!! hoilday!!! its holiday!! heh!
went for cheerleading and it was fun yet felt like crap.. suddenly felt so miserable.. such a failure!!! ->
failure cuz i do not know hw to do my stuff properly!! like how to do my jumps.. do my stunt properly.. even simple shoulder sit also can fall... and my captain have to tell me, " alison, show me something.." i was hit by it lah.. not say i am angry by wad she said.. is just that it hit me on my head!! ALISON wake up... look! have u realise u have not been doing anything till the very best.. putting ya best effort.. u have not excel in anything u do..
ya exams: i neva study hard like shit and putting the effort..
ya cca: wad have i been doing other den looking stupid while doing my jumps.. falling during all my stunts.. not doing my daily stretching...!!!! ARGH!!
my frens: neva put in my effort to make them feel comfortable or feel bonded...
ya attachment, my case study...
church...
everything.. i neva do well in anything.. really.. at that pt of time at cca.. i almost cried.. almost say quit!!! but i controlled.. crappy huh.. i felt useless!
meaning of useless:
useless–adjective
1.of no use; not serving the purpose or any purpose; unavailing or futile: It is useless to reason with him.
2.without useful qualities; of no practical good: a useless person; a useless gadget.
i am what is being explain above! no purpose.. not important.. i was wondering,
how long can my confidence of my outward appearence tolerate? how long more can withstand it?? sigh... the cheerful ass!! the chor lor girl!! ppl suan u her she suan them back kinda girl.. ppl bully her she scold back kinda girl.. be fierce in front of them kinda girl.. how long more can she still be who she is now??
lalala... okok... i noe all this crapp are very random... but no choice.. just felt like it.. so type lo! hahaha... yea.. thats about it..
gonna miss all my attachment new found frens!!! nazirah, lyz, deborah, loretta, james, joyce, peipei and the rest... hahaha.. u all are as crazy as me!! hahaha... shld meet up again!!
nazirah: be as crazy as u are now.. bike all.. fall down all!! hahaha.. all the FFFF u say.. i also say.. so no diff! heh..
lyz:be the starbucks ass still and as lacy as ever!!! haha... lace lingre!!
deborah: eh!! stop lookin at those malay and indian guys!! hehe!! i noe they are nice all.. haha.. esp the starbucks guy and the cubicle i am assigned too!!
Loretta: eh!! play bball tgt someday! heh! pretty girll.. be as loud as ever!! haha... ok.. mayb i am louder!! hah!
james: goon do ass!! stop hitting my head and jump on my nerves!! haha.. its fun knowing u.. even thou u are an ass! where is ya that GF of urs!! the girl with the blue uniform!! heh!
joyce: bf bf bf bf bf!! hahaha.. thats all i noe abt u!! heh! love sick everyday! ya future husband! *smile*
peipei: dun cry alr arh!! be happy always.. english can slowly learnt one!
okokok... i guess thats all!!! i shall end here!! see ya all soon!!
useless alison OUT (X
quizzes!!! some are damn crappy!! haha.. but its just for entertainment!
| Your Brain's Pattern |
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What Pattern Is Your Brain?
http://www.blogthings.com/whatpatternisyourbrainquiz/
| You Have a Choleric Temperament |
 You posses a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon.Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall.You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others. At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults.Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion.A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior. |
What Temperment Are You?
You Are 24% Lady |
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Are You A Lady?
What Your Underwear Says About You |
 You're comfortable in your own skin - and don't care to impress anyone. |
The Underwear Oracle
| Your Five Factor Personality Profile |
 You have medium extroversion.You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party.Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences.But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have low conscientiousness.Impulsive and off the wall, you don't take life too seriously.Unfortunately, you sometimes end up regretting your snap decisions.Overall, you tend to lack focus, and it's difficult for you to get important things done. Agreeableness: You have low agreeableness.Your self interest comes first, and others come later, if at all.In general, you feel that people are not to be trusted.And you're skeptical that anyone else really feels differently. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism.You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is medium.You are generally broad minded when it come to new things.But if something crosses a moral line, there's no way you'll approve of it.You are suspicious of anything too wacky, though you do still consider creativity a virtue. |
The Five Factor Personality Test
| Your Values Profile |
 You value loyalty a fair amount.You're loyal to your friends... to a point.But if they cross you, you will reconsider your loyalties.Staying true to others is important to you, but you also stay true to yourself. Honesty: You value honesty a fair amount.You're honest when you can be, but you aren't a stickler for it.If a little white lie will make a situation more comfortable, you'll go for it.In the end, you mostly care about "situational integrity." Generosity: You don't really value generosity.Your needs always come first, no matter what.And you'll possibly help someone else out...But only if it helps you in return. Humility: You don't really value humility.You don't have much to be humble about!And you might as well promote yourself, because no one else will.You're a pretty special person, and you let everyone know it. Tolerance: You value tolerance highly.Not only do you enjoy the company of those very different from you...You do all that you can to seek it out interesting and unique friends.You think there are many truths in life, and you're open to many of them. |
The Five Factor Values Test
What Your Sleeping Position Says |
| You are confident and ready to tackle life.You are pretty vain and happy with your physical appearance.You are born to be the center of attention, and you're unhappy on the sidelines.You're always up for trying something new - in and out of bed! |
What Does Your Sleeping Position Say About You?
| Your True Birth Month Is January |
 Loyal SocialLogical Easily jealous Loves children Rather reserved Highly attentive Likes to criticize Needs close friends Ambitious and serious Smart, neat and organized Hardworking and productive Loves to teach and be taught Quiet unless excited or tensed Sensitive and has deep thoughts Knows how to make others happy Searches for the greatest romance Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds Romantic but has difficulties expressing love Always looking at people's flaws and weaknesses |
Your Love Element Is Metal |
 You attract others with wit and a bit of flash.Your flirting style is defined by making others want and value you. Greatness and optimism are the cornerstones of your love life.You may let go too easily, but you never get weighed down by your past. You connect best with: Earth Avoid: Fire You and another Metal element: will control and smother each other |
What Element Is Your Love?
| You Are 39% Addicted to Love |
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Are You Addicted to Love?
| Your Power Color Is Gold |
 You are engrossed in passions that mentally stimulate you. At Your Lowest: You seek thrills and neglect what's important in your life. In Love: You see dating as adventure and approach it with an open attitude. How You're Attractive: You passion for life makes others passionate about you. Your Eternal Question: "Am I Having Fun?" |
crapp ans i get....
| Your Love Style is Agape |
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