Name:
Alison!!!
DOB:
080788.
Religion:
roman catholic.
Job:
missy.


memories will forever be a part of me. always...












#1 TO BE ABLE TO JUMP & WALK AGAIN

#2 CuRL my hair!

#3 a new/gd digital camera~=D

#4 go on a holiday only with my chubby...

#5 shades!

#6 u could give me one big surprise that i always wanted to get, go n do! *romantic kind*

#7 a necklace from my portable pillow!

#8 kate spade bag!

#10 clothes!! but i still wan more =(

#11 lose weight!

#12 a nice romantic date with my bibi!

#13 CAR!

i




am




tired...







You are Everything To Somebody
Right now at this very minute-----------

someone
is very proud of you

someone
is thinking of you

someone
cares about you

someone
misses you

someone
wants to talk to you

someone
wants to be with you

someone
hopes you aren't in trouble

someone
is thankful for the support you have
provided

someone
wants to hold your hand

someone
hopes everything turns out all right

someone
wants you to be happy

someone
wants you to find them

someone
is celebrating your successes

someone
wants to give you a gift

someone
think you ARE a gift

someone
hopes you are not too cold, or too hot

someone
wants to hug you

someone
loves you

someone
wants to lavish you with small gifts

someone
admires your strength

someone
is thinking of you and smiling

someone
wants to be your shoulder to cry on

someone
wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun

someone
thinks the world of you

someone
wants to protect you

someone
would do anything for you

someone
wants to be forgiven

someone
is grateful for your forgiveness

someone
wants to laugh with you about old times

someone
remembers you and wishes you were there

someone
needs to know that your love is unconditional

somebody
values your advice

someone
wants to tell you how much they care

someone
wants to stay up watching old movies with
you

someone
wants to share their dreams with you

someone
wants to hold you in their arms

someone
wants YOU to hold them in your arms

someone
treasures your spirit

someone
wishes they could STOP time because of you

someone
can't wait to see you

someone
wishes that things didn't have to change

someone
loves you for who you are

someone
loves the way you make them feel

someone
wants to be with you

someone
hears a song that reminds them of you

someone
wants you to know they are there for you

someone
is glad that you're their friend

someone
wants to be your friend

someone
stayed up all night thinking about you

someone
is alive because of you

someone
is wishing that you would notice them

someone
wants to get to know you better

someone
believes that you are their soul mate

someone
wants to be near you

someone
misses your guidance and advice

someone
values your guidance and advice

someone
has faith in you

someone
trusts you

someone
needs you to send them this letter

someone
needs your support

someone
needs you to have faith in them

someone
needs you to let them be your friend

someone
will cry when they read this



who is that someone? i can think of one... but... i cried.. when i read this.. this suck!

i step back one step alr.. i will wait for you to step forward...


Captured The Moment @

8:06 PM


finished my exams on thurs!

dennis manage to get out of camp that night.. =D
such a coincidence... hmmm...

den fri met up with melissa for a swim den to eat at Hougang mall...

sat... overslept.. but manage to make it for the sharing followed by a movie at AMK hub with daryl, "hunting party".. not bad..
had dinner with my gang at the airport.. we had fish n co... too alot of funny photos..

YESTERDAY!

BBQ with my classmates... was fun.. seriously... even thou it was raining the whole day! my goodness.. manage to BBQ chicken and stuff.. played games... cycle till my knee hurts last night... neck hurts too..

today went for facial n bought dennis something.. =)

cant wait for tmr...

p/s: realise alot of ppl gg for the vocational thingy this weekend.. wow!



ok... another passage u all can read!

To All Married Couples and To All Future Couples!!!!

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; I had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, 30% shares of my company and the car. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a months time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy.

Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset.

I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me; she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.

Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death does us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote:
'I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart'

The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, the property, the bank balance that matters. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you, but if you do, you just might save a marriage.

Relationships are made not to exploit, not to be broken.

We teach some by what we say
We teach some more by what we do

But we teach most by what we are
- Unknown

You don't get to choose how you are going to die, or when, but, you can decide how you are going to live, here and now.


Captured The Moment @

10:01 PM


its the end...

end of exams... finish my last paper.. but aint happy about it... dunno how the results will be.. so sian till i just take cab home...

MY MAID WASH MY BLANKET!
thats my smelly blanket... *argh*

i am upset.. seriously.. i duno man..

am i thinking too much?


Captured The Moment @

2:56 PM


i wish...

i just wish hard enough...

pls dont let it crumble... will i bang the wall that hard till i bleed... like wad julie says?




what if the Dr is looking for something.. assuming that pt has this certain illness.. but yet dunno if it is even there in the first place? is the Dr using too much brain on unnecessary things?

Dr or the team will know if the symptoms ever appear in time to come... the pt look pale btw... feeling hypoxic...


Captured The Moment @

1:23 PM


i give up..

when it will happen it happens...

i am not gonna fear... i will be the alison julie and nick they all know...


i am gonna be the way i was before...


Captured The Moment @

11:35 PM


i hope my 6 sense is wrong...
i hope i am thinking too much...
i hope it wont happen to me...

or is it really just my mind's wire are alil haywire?
i am scared...
things aren't the same.. i look back months ago... its diff from now...
emotions are running chaotic in me..
is it the dormant stress swimming around me? or am i right..
when the time is right.. it will happen.......


can u assure me? can you?

wad if my 6 sense was right... how am i gonna handle it? wad am i gonna do?
am i rest assured tt the "crumbled" pillar will appear??


Captured The Moment @

1:14 PM


its not the lungs.. not the liver nor the GI tract...

its the heart and the brain...
lack of oxygen... lack of blood flow...

finally the antibiotics works..
or shld i say it cure by itself... is all in the mind...
psychologically not really sane.. mental status a bit off.. =p

however, certain things came to consensus... super happy... the cells in the body start to multiply as normal.. the bacteria/virus are being eradicated... hurhurhur...

yea! stop the procedure... no more medical therapy...
this infection can be cured... it will be cured... its curing...

COOL!
does it sound interesting? its a case! wad case? DUNCH TELL YOU!!
damn... i am like HOUSE for this case.. happy that i solved the puzzle! wont you be happy too?? wahaha...


Captured The Moment @

11:15 PM


ok... got the answer...

answer to who made e error...

exams adds up to everything... even thou seems to be ladida.. half the time behind my head feeling all tensed up...


Captured The Moment @

1:04 AM


uneasy...
worried...
sensitive...

i am reflecting... lost...

wondering...

whose error?? wad can and did it go wrong that cause this infection for this case?


Captured The Moment @

9:50 PM


i seriously have no mood...

u kill the mood...
u affect me...
but u had your reasons...i know... but still...

i am pissed... very pissed... very unhappy... i have no choice but to be okay with it cuz of the reason you gave...

contradicting huh?

tsk here n there... get irritable easily... cuz u are tired.. cuz medication affects you... your flu n cough affects you..

but you didnt put in the effort to solve or improve the cough and flu so you wont be irritable..

fine... i learnt how to handle it.. no choice...


Captured The Moment @

11:47 PM


very nice! i like the way he put things... makes sense too... =)


Life and How to Survive It

Below is a speech to the graduating class of 2008 at NTU convocation ceremony last week by Adrian Tan, a litigation lawyer and the author of The Teenage Textbook. Read it! It's hilarious but very meaningful.

I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It’s a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me.

On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable.

Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife.

And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you’ve already won her heart, you don’t need to win every argument.

Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end of education. You’re done learning.

You’ve probably been told the big lie that “Learning is a lifelong process” and that therefore you will continue studying and taking masters’ degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don’t you think there is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to be repeat customers.

The good news is that they’re wrong.

The bad news is that you don’t need further education because your entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of you. You’re in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life expectancy.

I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean the average life span of a group of people. But I’m here to talk about a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life.

You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There’s very little danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time they need to spend in the bathroom.

So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you’ll have another 40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper.

Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they’re 50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn’t meet their life expectancy.

I’m here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it’s calculated based on an average. And you never, ever want to expect being average.

Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.

That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste.

If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them. And you don’t need years of education by the best minds in Singapore to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life’s a mess. You are not entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate.

Don’t expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from here. Or up. No one knows.

What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over.

Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it is undesirable.

Work kills. The Japanese have a term “Karoshi”, which means death from overwork. That’s the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day, bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there’s nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.

There’s a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are “making a living”. No, they’re not. They’re dying, frittering away their fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan "Arbeit macht frei" was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps. Utter nonsense.

Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway.

Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will have value in itself.

I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy it and I would do it for free. If I didn’t do that, I would’ve been in some other type of work that still involved writing fiction – probably a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don’t imagine you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I’ll go further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and feeling superior, you might become a teacher.

Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don’t, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I’m not asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be hated.

It’s not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused, murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.

One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it’s often the case that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one’s own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn’t say “be loved”. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.

You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

Don’t work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone.

You’re going to have a busy life. Thank goodness there’s no life expectancy.


Captured The Moment @

11:35 AM


alot of things happened... no more lessons in NYP for the near future...
exams are nearing...

went zouk with maria and nizz.. to celebrate maria's belated bdae! =)











































































dennis is back from brunei... finally...

had bdae dinner for my ah gong.. cut the cake and all...

anyway, i am so not in the mood for anything else.. for now..


Captured The Moment @

10:13 PM









this cartoon i found it while doing my slides!

ok.. yesterday was zj 5th anniversary!

had a video... almost quite a few pics i am inside! i felt old.. from dunno when till now!! OLD!! since fits.. 7 years alr.. tsk tsk! haha..

after that went for mass.. theres a new priest.. visiting our church for a few days! he very cute.. he said.. in his country a priest who only give a 15 mins surmon is a very lazy priest!! cuz in singapore.. our surmons can only last 12 mins or so.. haha!

after mass i went to amk hub with melissa, jerry, nick and ryan.. watched "dark knight"








the show damn nice! heh! the joker damn cute la! his acting damn real.. i like the part where he wears the nurses uniform.. damn funny the way he walked and all..

oh wells...

later will be ethan's baptism! =)

p/s: i updated my bdae photos! below... my bdae entry..


Captured The Moment @

12:42 PM


i need money.. i need it badly..

MONEY

dammit...


Captured The Moment @

3:46 PM


kinda relieve that they knew about certain things and yet say its modern and was ok la.. kinda thing.. slowly la..

but certain ppl knew some other stuff and cant accept it.. dont approve of it.. this making me very sandwich-ed.. my fault its a duh! reaction...

i want both.. i want the best of both worlds.. i want the both worlds to become one.. even thou it seems like everything is ok now.. but i know deep down we are not really ok..

i still have good frens.. but i kinda think i lost my closes friends in my life that i've found... it will neva be the same.. i was dependent and vice versa.. but maybe not so.. maybe.. i dun wan to think about the maybes..

can it be the same? i felt the awkwardness just that i dun really show it? or we dun show it. i felt the dull pain at the back of my head and chest.. telling me.. ''hey! you think u can forget about wad happen.. you wont..''

how ironic... life on the surface.. on the everyday life, it seems damn fucking gd.. going thru day by day laughing and going thru lessons.. yet how suffocating when my internal things starts to float up once in a while and den i choose to push it back down to stay sinked at the bottom...

my family is doing great.. ethan is going to get baptise on sunday.. today is my mom's bdae.. just an update i wanna update myself too.. to keep myself in check.. sometimes i lost my way of life...

went swimming on wed and today! SHAG! tired! muscle aching.. but SHIOK!
neva swim so much in my life... trying so hard not to eat so much after swim.. i managed to not eat that much.. jus a packet of milo at least.. and a proper meal.. lunch or dinner..

tanning tmr.. study tmr? hopefully..

exams coming! focus!!!

8 more days till you are back from brunei.. cant wait..

soteimmes i feel lkie i hvae fnres yet no fnres. tts the wrsoe


Captured The Moment @

11:32 PM